With every New Year comes new opportunities. If you have developed some bad sexual habits with your partner this is the perfect time to hit the restart button. If you aren’t sure how to go about making those changes, or what things you should focus on changings her are some tips to help you get your fresh start in the bedroom.
Pinpoint the problem
First things first. Before you can begin to fix anything, you need to figure out exactly what’s wrong. Perhaps when you first got together, sex didn’t feel good. Maybe you were unsure how to make it feel better so you let it continue as is. Or maybe you tried some things that you weren’t comfortable with, and now they have become a regular part of your sexual encounters. Maybe you were trying to boost his confidence and started faking it, as a result he continues to do what he thinks got you off then. All of these very common problems are fixable!
New Year – New Start
Try to get past how talking about sex makes you feel. It is necessary and will get easier with time. It will also help significantly when it comes to fixing problems. Remember “t’s not what you say it’s how you say it,” has never been truer than when it comes to opening this type of dialogue. Choose your words wisely so that you convey that you want to enjoy sex together more. Rather than conveying how unsatisfying it has been. For example, instead of, “You get off so fast, I always have to fake it, or do it myself.” Try “I love being intimate with you, but sometimes it feels rushed. I’d really like to take our time and see how great a longer night with you will be.”
Resolve to Keep Communication Open
Chances are if you are unhappy with an aspect of your sex life, your partner may be also. Ask how they feel about it. Ask if there is anything your partner would like to change. Be honest with each other. Agree to compromises if something doesn’t feel great to you but is great for your partner, offer to continue to do it only less, and offer up something else that feels great for you so you achieve a better balance.
Embark on a Year of Better Sex
Put the things you and your partner talk about into practice. Try the changes. Take time really getting to know each other’s bodies. Pay attention to how their bodies react to different types of stimulation. Skip the shortcuts. There is nothing wrong with a quickly now and then. However just as with anything else the more time you dedicate to learning more about what you like and what your partner likes the better things will become.
We wish you a happy, healthy, and sexy New Year!