Master Sexting Mondays: Drunk Sexting


Happy Monday. It’s time for our Master Sexting Series. This week we have a sext script for you that shows you even drunk sexting can be good, if done right. Hopefully you will find some inspiration and new ideas to send your sexy someone.

No, it’s better that you’re not here. I’ve befriended the bartenders, and they wouldn’t appreciate your stuffy tie as much as they’re appreciating my black panties.


Pants. I probably meant pants. The bar I found is by my house, not work…

: ( I guess I’m just going to head home. You could meet me and help “test” my new mattress.

I didn’t realize you’d destroyed your old one. How long did it last you, a year? Ha ha ha.

I mean, ahh ahh ahh…

I can just imagine you testing it with me. I can imagine you doing a lot of things with me.

Oh baby, I know how sleep deprived you are. Try to stay awake and get home safely…


I made it! I have to admit, I’m sad to see my mattress empty… where are you? As tired as I am, I won’t be sleeping for awhile.

Well, I’m not at your house because I’m at mine. I’m glad you made it safe and sound. Why won’t you be sleeping? Is your roommate playing video games again?

No — he’s not home.

Ooohhh — so sad. Two perfectly good opportunities to get into trouble – wasted. First, you were right by the office until late, and second, your roommate’s not home.

It’s never too late to find trouble, my dear.

The thought of your black lace panties kept me “alert” the whole drive home. And my rock-hard cock is what’s keeping me from going to sleep now.

sexting butts

I’m glad you liked my panties. I’m also glad no one walked in on me showing them to you. I can’t believe I lost that bet… I’m never gambling with you again! I’m happy you made it home okay. I was worried because I know you need sleep… How many hours did you work this week?

Oh, I liked them. I liked the sight of your fine ass more. Those panties are so sexy on you. I wanted to push you up against the wall, pull that black lace to the side, and give you the best head of your life.

I know — I need to get all the sleep I can to keep up with you. I put in 80 hours — and that was before today. I’m sleep deprived, but I won’t be going to sleep for awhile, thinking of your ass… on my face.

Now that your dirty comments have made me all hot and bothered, thinking about what you want to do to me, thinking about what I want you to do to me… I guess I won’t be going to sleep for awhile, either.

I can’t wait to see your next round of lingerie. And although I’m exhausted… I guess we can both “not sleep” together for a few minutes…

I can’t even think about the way you must taste without getting so damn hard.

Hahahaha — you don’t have to imagine how I taste. Just go drink some of your scotch.

Hahahaha — that’s not a bad idea. I might. But I know it’s not the same.

I just want to run my tongue up and down you. I just want to fill every inch of your wet, hot sweetness. What are you doing right now?

I’m in my spare bedroom, lying on the futon, with my hot sweetness throbbing. I’m rubbing it while I text you.

What are YOU doing, besides remembering the black lace?

I can’t stop thinking about how it would feel to cum inside you.

I can’t, either. You know how many times I’ve thought about how it would feel to have you fuck me? I’ve let you do it half a dozen times! At least, on paper… : )

Oh my god, Paper Me is so lucky!

I bet he makes you moan so loud… I would make you moan like a ghost.

I’m thinking about how it would feel to slowly push my dick inside of you and pull it out against your clit over and over until it was too much, and I had to turn you over and fuck you while I pulled your hair and made you scream my name so loud the neighbors can hear it.

Tell me more about what you’re doing right now. I’m a details kinda guy…

I’m imagining my hands are really your hands, and you are pinching my nipples, and sliding your fingers up and down across my clit. Right up into my hot pussy, pushing against my pubic bone…oooh… and I’m wishing I could feel the weight of you on top me.

That’s so fucking hot. Go on…

 Ok.. I’ve got two fingers inside me and I squeeze them with my cunt and I imagine your reaction if I did that to you — to your cock. If you were laying on top me, and I told you that you couldn’t move, that you had to stay immobile, and then I watched your face as I fucked you without moving anything but the muscles inside me, squeezing you.

But I would also go for a little bit of biting on the side — you know, my neck. My ears. My nipples. And you were spot-on earlier — I like a little hair-pulling, too.

Holy fucking shit. Get over here and on my cock RIGHT NOW. I need to feel my dick inside your wet pussy as you squeeze it and ride me.

I can just imagine the way your nipples taste. Fuck, you’re going to make me cum so hard.

I am like a fucking Slip and Slide right now — you would literally think we were doing it in water. I’m GOING to make you cum so hard? You haven’t already? I’ve cum about 3 times already.

Granted, they’re little cums. Lower on the Richter scale. Not like the 8.7 you would give me.

Sometimes you need a couple of small ones to get ready for total destruction.

Oh my god I want you so bad. I would bury my face in your cunt and not breathe until you came. I want to get so kinky with you. I want to put you on all fours and eat your amazing ass from behind.

Wow. That just made my stomach flip. Like I’m on a roller coaster. A kinky-sexy-making-me-cum-until-I-cry roller coaster.

I told you I’m a kinky bastard. I wanna hear you cry out from cumming so hard. And after I make you cum from that, I would put you on your back with your legs around my neck and I’d pump into you while sliding my fingers across your clit. I would slowly slide my tongue into your mouth to try and keep you from waking up my neighbors.

You seem oddly preoccupied with your neighbors — sometimes you want them to hear me, and sometimes you don’t…? I don’t really worry about mine. I’m pretty loud in the morning, when I’m getting off. I’m sure they enjoy it. But I’m quiet at night when I need to be.

woman sexting

We will see you next week for more tips and tricks to help you master sexting.


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